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Out of Left Field: He really should have worn a cup

by Steve Keene

MlbHlSqWell, baseball is well and truly back after the All-Star break, and so is your loyal correspondent after a longer break of his own. And many apologies to my tens of readers for my absence, and all credit to our beloved leader Matt Smith, who somehow produces such volumes of great content week-in, week-out. I struggle to produce this half-baked collection of links once a week, so I don’t know how he does it.

Without any further ado, let’s take a look at what has been going on in the ker-razy world of baseball this week.

I like a little flutter, but I am well aware of how it is frowned upon in baseball (Hi Pete Rose!). However, this is a story about a retired player, playing golf, so I think we are safe. John Smoltz was a 15-1 shot to win the American Century Celebrity Golf Championship. By the time he teed off, that was down to 11-1. Rumour is that this was down to Smoltz putting a heap of money on himself. Unfortunately, he only came second. At those odds, he really should have bet each-way.

Smoltz wasn’t the only player feeling some regret this week. Tim McCarver backtracked over comments he had made comparing the Yankees to Nazi Germany and Stalinist Russia. I think someone has taken those Evil Empire references a little too literally. Although, to be fair to McCarver, it wasn’t as if he was insinuating that the Yankees send failures to the Gulag rather than the minor leagues. And as far as I’m aware, he did not indicate that they have designs on Poland. He did suggest that Joe Torre had been airbrushed out of Yankees history. So, Torre as Trotsky, I guess. Watch those icepicks Joe!

The Yankees do have half an eye on a British invasion, though. According to that ever-reliable periodical, the Daily Star, the Yankees are looking to buy Tottenham Hotspur. I think there are enough Yankees caps being worn around London as it is, without this happening. This is the last thing we need. Although maybe it will convince non-Spurs supporting baseball cap wearers to put on a cap of another team. Am I the only one who gets excited when I see a baseball cap being worn that isn’t a Yankees one?

Fancy some fun injuries? I just know that you do. How about poor David Freese? Already on the DL with an injured right ankle, he then managed to fracture his toe after dropping a plate on it in the gym. I’m assuming that the ‘plate’ is a piece of gym equipment, and that he wasn’t having his dinner at the gym. I have no idea, because I avoid gyms. As this story proves, they are dangerous places. David needs to follow my lead. I am a fine sporting specimen, just sitting here, festering on my sofa. I’m expecting the call-up to the big leagues at any moment.

Or how about Carl Crawford? See if you can watch this video without wincing. Apparently the medical term for this injury is “testicular contusion”. And apparently Crawford doesn’t wear a cup. Ouch. I must say, I feel a little sick. I can’t even bring myself to make any Vienna Boys’ Choir jokes.

On that testicular bombshell, I shall bid you all adieu for this week. Enjoy your baseball folks, and if you see anything fun, let me know, and make this lazy, lazy man’s job easier. You will have my undying gratitude. Or just hit the comments – will be good to hear from ya!

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Richard July 24, 2010 - 9:42 am

I think most people waring Yankee caps in London dont know the first thing about baseball. They think its a tousit gimmick from NYC

Matt Smith July 24, 2010 - 11:38 am

Good to have you back, Steve!

I haven’t dared watch that Carl Crawford clip, reading about it has been painful enough. I guess wearing a cup is a comfort issue that some players are just never keen on (it happened to Adrian Beltre last year and he said he would still not wear one), but not wearing one is basically giving the finger to the baseball gods, who are always happy flip the finger back with a cheeky smile!

Here’s a fun game: go up to someone wearing a Yankees cap in the UK and say something about Mo Rivera or Derek Jeter. Typically they’ll look at you as if you’re nuts!

Steve Keene July 26, 2010 - 12:12 pm

It is kind of strange how Yankees merchandise is everywhere, yet the awareness level of the team itself is so low.

In contrast, I worked with a Yankees fan who had an incredible knowledge of baseball, yet wearing a Yankees cap was a pretty poor way of showing it. I guess that is what you get for rooting for the Yankees!


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